One Balanced Life

Today was one of those days where I had to grow up a little (or at least a little bit more). And I’ll be honest I didn’t want to. My mom, diagnosed with early-onset Alzheimers, had her 6-month neurology appointment. As a family we had decided one of the kids needed to take her to give my dad a break. And since I have the most flexible schedule the task fell to me.

I spent yesterday a bit anxious…preparing for her response. Bracing myself for her reluctance when I would have to say I was taking her and for the anger that would follow when I would have to ask the doctor about her driving ability. In a sort of foggy way I’ve known that the day would come when I would have to start taking care of my parents and frankly yesterday I thought I am not ready for this. The thought actually popped into my “Hell I can barely take care of myself and the kids.” And I went to bed a bit heavy with dread.

But as usual life surprises - with the promise of a fancy coffee drink on the way she went with me happily and chatted about how fun it was for me to go with her (not at all her usual reaction to my involvement). Dressed in tie-dyed socks and dangly earrings, I watched her nervously answer the doctor’s questions and my heart broke a little with her straining for the answers and need for approval. I silently cheered her on and thought to myself (crap I don’t know the damn date). I was able to broach the sticky issues with more ease and grace than I thought myself capable of.

As I got in the car to drive back to the cities - tears filled my eyes. I reflected on the calls/texts from friends supporting me, about my mom bringing me a glass of water in bed the night before, and the whispered thank you from my father. I realized taking care of my parents is a gift and so is letting others do the same for me.

And I realized growing up isn’t that hard. It is just about having the courage to face whatever it is you thought you couldn’t.

Where do you need to grow up? What is it you need to face? You can do it. Not so bad really.